Monday, February 13, 2012

So true... why didn't I think of writing these down...?

I intend no copyright infringement. There's a strong probability that this list has been circulating online forever, and I'm just now coming across it because my children stole my life.

But it's funny regardless. Especially #7. And #17. And I'm all for sharing laughter.


23 Adult Truths
1) Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

2) Nothing sucks worse than a moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3) I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4) There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5) How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6) Was learning cursive really necessary?

7) Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8) Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the people died.

9) I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind-of tired.

10) Bad decisions make good stories.

11) You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12) Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection.... again.

13) I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14) I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15) I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16) I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17) I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18) I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19) How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20) I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21) Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22) Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the donkey- but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

23) The first tentacular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

The sad thing is I can't remember what I wanted to write...

Honestly, the past 2 months have flown by. Christmas was at my parents house again this year. But unlike in years past, both kids seemed to get the idea of Santa, especially Eric who danced euphorically when he saw a firetruck waiting for him under the tree. Also, no one got seriously ill this year, which was a major bonus! Here's a picture of Eric discovering his firetruck.

Rachel got a pony. The only pony she will ever receive as long as her mother draws breath...

Since Eric's birthday is right after Christmas, he gets a birthday party at my parents house with his cousins. He was able to finally blow out his own candles this year...

...But because Eric has a lot of friends from his preschool, he specifically asked for a Chuck E Cheese birthday party for his preschool friends. Eric cried and jumped into my arms as soon as he saw the giant rat coming to his table (Eric is on the bottom right, crying and sucking his fingers).

The video games, however, were a huge hit. Eric was afraid of the ticket machine, like a wind tunnel that blows free tickets around for the birthday boy/girl to grab. So Rachel and Daddy enjoyed it while Eric watched happily.

Now that we're out of photos... some mile-stones for the kids:

1) Eric has started throwing lovely 4 year-old tantrums. Some of the words that come out of his mouth: "Go away!"
"Ugh! You're making me embarrassed!"
"Stop!!!!!!"
Rachel can also throw some amazing tantrums on her own. I shudder when I think of the upcoming teen years... Adolescent tantrums combined with hormones! :-(

2) Rachel received a clock for Christmas that helps her know when to wake up for mornings and nap-times. It's pink with a cute sleeping cow that turns into a dancing cow in a ballet outfit for waking.
"Mommy!! The cow's awake! That silly cow..." is something that is heard repeatedly in our home. If Rachel wakes up before the cow, she will sometimes make you come upstairs with her and stare at the clock until "the cow wakes up."

3) We've gotten almost no snow this year (?!) but the kids are discovering how much fun it is to play in the rain. I have no problem with this as long as I can watch them from inside. Rachel in particular has an affinity for jumping in puddles, digging in the dirt, etc. If it gives me ten minutes of peace and quiet, I'm all for it.

4) We have tried to get Rachel potty-trained, but to no avail. She is either physically ready but not emotionally capable, or vice versa. She loves wearing underwear. She really loves the idea of getting lollipops for when she uses the toilet. She just doesn't seem to care if she goes in her pants, and she's also a bit confused about how to get stuff into the potty. She'll sit on the little frog potty for about .8 seconds before jumping up excitedly and asking for a lollipop. [Sigh]
I'm not too worried about it. I mean, it's not like she's going to start high school in diapers.

All in all, it's been a good start to the year. Sorry for not keeping up with this blog. I had a good birthday weekend in January. I'm hoping that this will be the Year of Successful Potty Training and Less Tantrums. But I may be overshooting... :-)