Friday, November 20, 2009

Another Thing I Never Thought I'd Say...

To Eric before heading outside:

Me: [sniff] "Eric, I hope that bean smell is your breath and not your butt."

I never thought what I said was disgusting, which just goes to show you how much parenthood changes everything.

To think I have friends who envy the fact that Eric loves beans. Come on over and change just one diaper, and you will go home and thank your lucky stars that your child lives on ice cream and french fries.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Wordless Wednesday


Lord have mercy... She can crawl.

Monday, November 16, 2009

I'm such a slug

OK, not really. I mean, I've been dealing with the kids all day and a recovering husband, but I had my parents all weekend long... and I'm just NOW updating my blog. So it's time once again for...

BULLETS!!*

- Rachel is crawling. She can only take a "step" or two at a time, but once she really starts moving, my life will enter a new phase of suck.

- The kids have started to have different bed times. Eric wants to go down around 9 and wake up at 8:30 in the morning. If he were an only child, John and I would throw a party. Unfortunately, Rachel wants to go to bed at 7pm and wake up anytime between 6-7am. Lord have mercy. I can't handle a 14 hour work-day! I'm hoping they get on the same schedule again very soon.

- My husband is an awesome guy. (If you know me personally, then you'll understand and smile.)

- People who are supposed to be waiting in hospital waiting rooms should NOT under any circumstances be on a laptop AND on their cell phone as if they were in a Starbucks. And they DEFINITELY should not be on their cell phones talking about hunting. Noisy places bother me. Noisy people really bother me. I told John I was about to take the man's laptop and cell phones and give these people a real reason to be in a hospital. But we were called in before I could make good on my threat. More's the pity. ;-)

- And... I can't think of anything else to talk about. My days consist of doing errands, chores, and taking care of the kids. Such excitement.

- Oh! I finally bought a high quality artificial tree (when you're allergic to the real thing you have to spend the money on something that won't look like a hat rack in 2 years time). It looks great. So I put it up on Friday because my parents were here to watch the kids, and I didn't know when I would get the chance to do it closer to Christmas.

Cars drive by our house at night and literally BRAKE when they see the tree. I want them to be thinking, "Wow! Isn't that tree beautiful! How exciting! I'm really in the Christmas spirit!"

But I'm sure it's more along the lines of, "What the...?? It's not even THANKSGIVING yet! Is this the same family that only wears pants when taking the garbage out?** It figures. And what is that crazy blond toddler doing dancing around the tree like a Druid on crack?"

We really need to invest in window treatments.

*Not the kind that I would use on the assertive jerks with Maryland tags who drive in the DC Metro area, but the kind that cause less pain for everyone. Even bad drivers.
**I swear that's not me

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Wordless Wednesday... sort-of

The Friday before Halloween (Happy Belated Birthday KC!) is a special day for children in the Charlottesville area. The kids get dressed up in their Halloween costumes and head to UVA to go trick or treating on the Lawn. Eric refused to let us dress him up as a dragon (toddlers suck), so I had the grand idea of dressing Rachel as a giant strawberry while Eric would be a farmer who won first place for her.

OK... *I* thought it was clever, but on closer inspection, the idea sucked. But whatever. Here are pictures. :-)
Rachel was adorable as a strawberry (couldn't find a tomato costume). I love this shot of her and her daddy!


Farmer Eric with his Grandma.



Saturday, October 24, 2009

American... boy?

Had to share this.

Last week we received a copy of American Girl magazine in the mail. For those who aren't familiar, American Girl is a collection of historical dolls with story books. You can get a doll customized also. I saw the magazine and got slightly irritated 'How do they know we have a little girl?? Aren't they hooking them a little young?'

Then I saw who the magazine was addressed to- my father-in-law! That cracked me up. I called my mother-in-law and we had a good laugh. She wanted to see the magazine, so I put it on the kitchen table to save it.

The next morning, Eric was eating his oatmeal and I saw this...
He was casually browsing through the magazine while eating breakfast.

American Girl must know my family better than I do!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

My Pathetic 15 Minutes of Fame

My dad found a review of a Japanese movie that I was an extra in while living on Yokota Air Base. It brought back some hilarious memories, which I thought I'd share because I have no humorous stories to write about as of late. If you read the linked review, then you know why my family could never find this movie or heard anything about it. Apparently this movie makes Cloverfield look like Ben Hur.

A lot of American kids in Japan got into modeling and acting. During the 80's the Japanese were really into using foreignors to advertise. Many Japanese movies were filmed in English and then subtitled in Japanese. My sister was a successful model in Japan. But I was a glasses-wearing, prepubescent girl whose only modeling job was when I happened to tag along to my sister's shoot and fit into the clothes another American girl was too big for.

I had lived in Japan for maybe a month or so when our sponser told us about the opportunity to be an extra in this movie. I think their child was supposed to be in it, but he/she got sick and so they asked my folks if I would be interested. For like $50, American kids on base were picked up by bus and taken to a Japanese school somewhere off-base where they were shooting this movie. They needed school-age children, and I think I was about to turn 11. Most of the kids were my age, maybe a little older. The only thing I remember about the trip was spending the entire bus ride finishing an awful teen novel.

It was a dreary day. I'm not sure if it was raining or not. The only scene we shoot the entire day was of all us kids getting off of an American-style school bus, something they don't have in Japan. I wonder now where they got one... We would all pile on the bus. The bus would drive to the front of the school and stop. We would get off the bus. We did this over and over again, and I'm all of 10 and have no patience for this crap. So I stop getting off the bus because, really, what's the point?

Some Japanese man comes onto the bus (I'm sitting in the back) and heads straight for me. I think I'm in serious trouble. He wants me to put on an ugly orange sweatshirt over my shirt. I tell him no. Him, being Japanese and assuming I simply can't understand him, gets someone who speaks English to come onto the bus and tell me to wear it. I tell him no. But eventually they wear me down. I put it on. They leave. I take it off (I'm so screwed because this stubborn gene is already showing up in both of my kids).

We break for lunch, which is a Japanese bento box. I would kill for these kind of lunches today. But since I'm 10, I don't appreciate the food and barely eat anything. I look over and see this fat American who must have been about 14 or so eating a McDonald's hamburger. I covet. I also recognize him as being one of the kids with a speaking part. I covet even more.

After lunch I am taken to meet a very tall middle-aged American man with blond hair. He was wearing all black and had on sunglasses. I asked him for a speaking role. He said I should talk to the director. I thought he was the director. He turned out to be Troy Donahue. Oops. My dad's sister almost had a heart attack when she found out I had met her idol. I was simply pissed that the fat kid had a speaking role while I didn't.

Back onto the bus to shoot more thrill-a-second passenger shots. A boy sitting across the aisle from me told me his name, which I can't remember now. He was 12 and lived on Yokosuka, the naval base. I remember he had auburn hair and pretty eyes. He tells me he wants to kiss me, and since I'm a ugly girl with glasses I'm all for this turn of events. So the next shot when the kids are getting off the bus, this boy and I duck down and "kiss." Which is to say, we tried to get our lips to touch but ended up laughing most of the time. But considering all the takes of this stupid bus stopping and starting, we may have kissed about 10 times for all I know.

Then I think it either really did start to rain, or the director simply gave up. We piled back on the Japanese bus to head home. I looked in my envelope and saw (what I remember being) a 5,000 yen note.

So if you ever happen to stumble across this movie, and watch a scene of young children filing off of a school bus, just remember why you can't see a blond girl getting out of the bus in an orange sweatshirt. She was too busy making out with an older guy.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Wordless Wednesday