Wednesday, July 27, 2011

I don't understand what the big deal is...

Last night went something like this...
Me: I love cuddling.

John: I can't see my computer.

Me: Isn't this great? All this love and affection without having to put out?? It's like a dream come true!

John: [mumbling] More like a nightmare...

Me: [contented sigh] So... what are you thinking about?

John: Bear trap.

Me: ?

John: Bear trap. You know... trying to bite my arm off in order to escape...

Me: Too many pillows for that. Aren't throw pillows great? You know what we need?? Scented candles!

John: True. I could always light myself on fire...

Me: You have a bad attitude. Do all men think this way?

John: It's hot and uncomfortable. It's not like men get much out of it. Isn't there some scene in "When Harry Met Sally" about how men think about how long they have to cuddle without being rude?

Me: Huh. I didn't know you watched that movie...

John: My testicles had already shriveled up from having to sit in the same room while you watched "Titanic" last year.

Me: [sigh] I love that movie...

John: Can I go back to reading now?

P.S. I had no idea men were such pigs. This is why John gets anniversary gifts like this. As opposed to this. It's called priorities, honey. THAT is what you get out of cuddling. But if you ever get over your phobia of intimacy, the 45K is coming out of your pay-check as my current employer has me on call 24/7 and refuses to pay me. I also hear he hates cuddling. :-)

4 comments:

S.C.M. said...

I guess I am lucky then, my husband loves to cuddle. But then someone it always leads to him wanting something.. lol. Maybe he has ulterior motives. lol

Jen said...

lol. Don't they all? :-) Awesome you have a husband who loves to cuddle. Make sure he and my husband never talk. John's a bad influence.
;-)

S.C.M. said...

Or maybe my husband could tell him the benefits that come with a good cuddle. lol.

K Wray said...

When my husband wonders why he gets a card for our anniversary instead of a real gift I am having him read your post. :) Thanks!