This proves that Target.com has one of the worst search engines on the internet.

I remember when I started baby registries online. I decided to use Target for some of my maternal needs, mostly because it was a store that my relatives could walk into and buy something off of a registry. That, and I hate Wal-mart.

So tonight when John had trouble finding an HDMI cable through Best Buy, I suggested a store like... Target! I mean, Target had to have HDMI cables, right?

Unfortunately, John used Target's search engine before I could warn him that typing something specific could cause massive headaches. He started typing, and then he got very quiet.

"So..." John finally said. "I put 'male displayport to male HDMI' in the search bar for Target's web site..."

"That was probably your first mistake, honey..."

John starts laughing. "No, no! It gets better! The first two entries are 'An Introduction to Male Reproductive Medicine and 'The Family Jewels (A Guide to Male Genital Play And...'

"'And...?' 'And' what?"

John stares at the screen. "I have to know..."
He mouses over the title. And bursts out laughing. "'... And torment!'"
I chuckled. "You know, honey... A lot of bad things have come out of 'I have to know.' Just saying..."

"I think I'm scarred for life."


It turns out Target has a big martial/sexual aid section online. But no HDMI cables. Or prostate massagers for that matter... I mean... in case you were wondering.

But they are selling babies:


Post-script:
John: Just for the record, I only ran a search for that massager as a joke. I have absolutely zero interest in that sort of thing.
Me: Uh-oh. I just blogged about it. Maybe you'll get lucky and no one will read this post.
John: S**t.
Me: You're welcome.