Sleep is for the weak

I want to sleep though. Desperately. It's 12:30am and I've been awake since 8am. Why can't I sleep??!! Ugh.

Something I Thought I'd Never Say

Eric is a clever little guy. Today he figured out how to turn on the t.v. He started using his index finger to press buttons a few days ago, but he's reaching a point where he can cause chaos.

When he found the t.v. remote today, he pressed the "FIOS" button, which lit up the "power" button. He then pressed the power button and Oprah was on that particular channel. Eric happily dropped the remote and crawled over to the t.v. He glanced back at me while standing up and banging away on the t.v. And then he did something that made me laugh out loud. He started licking the t.v. He stood back for a moment, then proceeded to lick Oprah cleavage on the television. This prompted me to say something I never thought I would say. "Honey, please stop licking Oprah's cleavage."

Our telephone is no longer safe. Making or taking calls has become a hassle, as he seems to instinctively know where the "off" button is. I think his favorite toys, in order are as follows-

1. Window-blind cords. There really is a reason why they have those warning labels that say "This is not a toy."

2. The microwave. Fortunately (or unfortunately) this is mounted over our stovetop. So Eric can't reach it, but he can start smiling and wiggling happily when he is walked past the microwave.

3. The air purifier. I just put this on the floor and let him have at it. I figure, it's small and he can't hurt himself.

4. Tissues have become a new toy. He just takes them out of the box one by one. The hyper-allergenic mom with the sinus issues is not pleased.

5. Remotes, but not TOY remotes (those are lame, mom).

6. Telephones.

And because he's a boy, every day is Baby Suicide Day. He goes for the stairs at least 3 times a day. Every time he crawls away from me, panting in anticipation, and heads for the stairs I jokingly refer to it as "Baby Suicide Attempt Number 1" etc. And then when I grab him before he has a chance to get near the top, I imagine Eric saying "Baby Suicide Attempt Number 1 thwarted." I imagine many people reading this will think I'm somehow a bad parent. These people don't have little boys. :-)

I am so tired of throwing up!

There is nothing worse than being sick on a regular basis, knowing that it's coming, and not being able to do a thing about it. Ugh.

There used to be a pattern to my "morning sickness." If I didn't take an antihistamine before going to bed, I would get sick first thing in the morning. Always. Now I am getting sick anytime of day with no warning. I've had no nausea, just vomiting. This pregnancy is really taking a toil on my body. Maybe it's all the stress of being a mom. The really sad part is that every time I throw up, Eric starts crying. Poor thing. And if John's not here, there's nothing I can do about it except hear him cry from his little play-yard and feel guilty. It really sucks.

Tonight we met friends at a Moroccan restaurant near our house. It was the first time I have ever tried Moroccan food. Our friend C is going to be working in the Democratic Republic of the Congo for the next two months, so this dinner with all of her friends was a good-bye of sorts. C has lived in Morocco and is familiar with good Moroccan food the way I can tell the difference between good Japanese cuisine and faux garbage. And this restaurant was awesome. The food was amazing. And the best part was that Eric was incredibly good the entire night. We were there for two hours, and the little guy never cried or fussed. He ate his dinner well, played with the spoons, and only needed to be held towards the end (when it took eight highly intelligent people with graduate degrees from public Ivy League schools fifteen minutes to figure out how to pay the bill!). And the people in the restaurant actually served Eric water (which we had to ration) and a menu (which Eric gnawed on for about an hour, particularly the wine list- he's the son of two UVA pep-banders, so what can I say?) and silverware as if he were a paying customer. It was so sweet, especially for a romantic restaurant to be so family-friendly. I never knew how much I would really appreciate something like that until I had kids.

DH means something different for guys

So John (formerly DH) read my blog posts and wanted to know what "DH" stood for. I explained that women who go to blogs just know that "DH" stands for "darling husband." WHY women use "DH" and not something an adjective that's more modern (or in some cases more accurate) is beyond me. But I just go with it.

So last night John tells me that in baseball (damn the World Series), "DH" stands for "Designated Hitter." He told me that in the American League (?) this person bats for the pitcher and is usually at the end of his career and is good for almost nothing. For some women, the irony of that must be great. But seeing as John is a good husband and dad, and he doesn't care much about anonymity, I'll just use his real name.

Thought it was interesting enough info to post. Does ANY woman know that? I didn't!

Window of Opportunity

The ped recommended we feed Eric solids when he gets hungry (which is every 4 hours) and THEN give him his bottle. The usual way of giving him a bottle when he's starving and then solids about an hour or so later hasn't worked so well. He's gaining weight, but not finishing his solids. I think we would go through MAYBE 2 jars a day if we were lucky. So I began giving him solids first for lunch and dinner along with a 6 ounce bottle.

This worked well yesterday, but today for lunch he freaked out that he wasn't getting his bottle. Like a good, trained ex-teacher I refused to give in and made him finish his solids before he chugged the 6 ounces (and he did chug the 6 ounces). Of course he managed to get pureed beef, corn, and veggie all over himself and me during his tantrum, but I'm proud of not giving in. I just really hope that this doesn't become a daily thing, or I may throw a tantrum myself.

The problem I'm now finding with feeding Eric this way is that by his second nap, usually around 3pm, he is a little hungry. So, do you put him down so that he wakes up hungry and ready to eat solids without a fight? Or do you give him a little bit of a bottle and wait until he's hungry again after he wakes up before giving him solids? I tried the former yesterday. He didn't nap well. So today I tried the second option. He was very tired- he hadn't slept in 3 hours. I gave him 5 ounces. He drained the bottle in less than 3 minutes and started crying for more. [grrr] SO... I caried him downstairs and made another 3 ounces while holding him (The reason being I really thought I might go crazy if I put him in his playpen and had to listen to him scream while I was making the bottle). I have to say that holding Eric at all anymore is starting to hurt my back. I've only gained 10 pounds so far in this pregnancy (almost 17 weeks now), but my God that kid weighs a ton!

Anyway, I digress... So I took the newly made 3 ounces and baby and went back to the nursery. He finished it very quickly. I rocked him and prayed he would go to sleep. But as any parent will tell you (and I'm finding out much to my dismay) there is a window of opportunity for naps. Put a child down too early and they toss and turn, sleeping for only 30 minutes or so. Eric did that yesderday. Put a child down too late, and they get giddy and can't sleep.

After drinking the bottle, Eric started to get a little giddy and wanted to crawl. I let him into my bedroom and read a few books to him. He loves turning the pages. A little too much, unfortunately. I've had to ad-lib a lot of the book because he'll gleefully turn the pages before the first line of the page is out of my mouth. After ten minutes of reading, I got what every tired mother longs to hear from her child- a yawn! I put him back down. He fussed for a few minutes, but now seems to be asleep, thank God! I swear if feeding him solids and a bottle screws with his nap schedule, I'm going back to the old way of feeding. Mommy NEEDS a break!

"baby punching", or The Joys of Google

(Guest entry by "DH")

Tonight, Jen had a book club meeting with some people from her Yahoo mom's group. I was on Eric duty (doody? thankfully no ... he was surprisingly easy tonight, except for some hiccups when he was trying to go to sleep ... "Dad, I'm TIRED, but I can't stop hiccuping ... WAAA!!").

Anyway, after Jen came home, she told me a little about the meeting. One of her fellow attendees apparently has her own blog named "Baby Bunching." The title comes from the fact she has two kids 14 months apart (that doesn't feel familiar at all ... no sir). Anyhow, I figured I would give it a look see (or at least bring it up since Jen would probably scour over it later). So, what do I do but ask the Greater Oracle (aka Google)?

This is what you get:



That DEFINITELY wasn't what I meant!

What IS it with all this vomiting?

I was planning on writing about what a great day I had with Eric today. He learned how to clap for the first time and imitates you when you start clapping. It's very cute. I had to clean the downstairs wood floors today, so I started Swiffering (I wasn't sure how he would take the vacuum). He would chase the Swiffer as I dusted the floor, which was hilarious... until he caught the Swiffer. Don't want him putting yet MORE things in his mouth he shouldn't eat.

But later tonight, everything took a turn for the worst. DH and I fed him solids, which he ate well. But he was so tired. I think he napped for maybe two hours total today. So by 7:30 we figured it was time for his bath. After his bath, we dried him off and gave him his last 8 oz. bottle. After drinking that he started sucking his thumb which usually means he's still hungry. I shouted for DH to make another bottle. And then, it happened. Eric looked right at me and puked all over me. Then he started crying. As I was comforting him, he puked again. This time he did it right in my mouth. This would have been funny after the fact, IF I weren't pregnant and getting sick all the time, and IF it had been DH and not me.

But that made me start vomiting. At least I made it to the bathroom. And poor DH had to clean up Eric, the floor, the rocking chair... what a guy.

Colds suck

DH and I went with friends to the Maryland Renaissance Festival yesterday. As always, it was great fun. We actually dressed up this year. I really should have taken pictures...

But I woke up this morning with a cold. We had to get to our church for Eric's baby dedication, so DH had to take over all morning baby duties. When he does things like this, it just makes me love him so much... Oh, and when we got to the church we met former Redskin Daryl Green who also calls our church home! He is one of Dh's idols from childhood, and it was a great experience.

On a sadder note, Eric has been vomiting every night for two nights in a row. He hasn't been eating many solids, and sometimes skipping lunch. He eats well in the morning though... I'm starting to get worried. If this happens again tomorrow, it's time for a ped visit because he's already lost some weight. Scary.

Amazing Race in La Paz!

I was watching the Amazing Race tonight, one of my favorite shows, and they went to the city of La Paz in Bolivia. Since Mariko just moved to La Paz, I was especially interested in this episode. Mariko had mentioned in her blog about the poverty in Bolivia, the altitude sickness (at 12,000 feet above sea level, it's the highest city in the world), and the hardship of the indigenous people. I wanted to see if the show would use this opportunity to help the indigenous people by using their businesses and highlighting their culture. I wasn't disappointed. It was incredible to watch, and I hope the people in Bolivia who participated in the show were paid well.

Bad night, bad day

I had horrible insomnia last night. DH and I were up until 2am.

So it should come as no surprise that Eric woke us up at 6:30am crying and very upset. We couldn't figure out what was wrong... a nightmare maybe? We changed him and fed him a bottle, and then put him back down. We didn't hear from him again until 9am, which meant we could head to church this morning.

As per usual, he was great at first in the nursery, but at the end of the service our pager went off and Eric was doing his usual gasping sobs. I don't know what sets that off... maybe just too long away from mom and dad. I always have such a great appreciation for nursery workers. I could never baby-sit 5 or so babies.

It's now after 1pm, and he just went down for his first(?) nap. If the morning counts as a nap, then this could be his last one... This wouldn't be an issue except that Eric decided to not eat any solids today. The 9 month hunger strike has officially begun. It sucks, let me tell you. He starts gagging and retching when you feed him ANY solids, even oatmeal which he loves. I just have to keep remembering that babies phase in and phase out of everything and that this, too, shall pass...

Becky's baby shower

DH, Eric, and I had a great time today at Billy and Becky's BBQ shower. We bought her a video monitor, which is the best invention ever for a moms like me who are type A and want to check on their babies whenever they're asleep. I am terrified of SIDS...

I couldn't believe Eric made it through over 2 hours there. He was all smiles, flirting horribly with every female there. He skipped his afternoon nap, so I thought for sure there would be serious issues with us going. Nope. He was great. I don't even think he napped in the car on the way home.

I wish Becky well. She's also doing the Bradley method, which is tough to do in a hospital setting. She's due on December 15th, so like Eric their baby will probably come around Christmas. I wish I had thought to bring my camera and take some pictures while we were there. We ran into friends that live as far away as Pittsburgh, and we may not see them again for awhile...

Drive by Wining

Yesterday I was out at the Target in Reston to grab a couple of things. Taking Eric there is always a crap-shoot. He usually handles himself well, but sometimes he starts fussing and squirming in his stroller as if it's a medieval torture device, and I never know how he's going to act in public. So my solution is simple- I don't go out much.

If anyone out there is familiar with the Target in Reston, Virginia then you already know that the worst drivers in the world congregate there on a daily basis, especially around lunch time. Unfortunately with Eric's current nap schedule, this is precisely when we end up going. Part of the problem is that there are no stop or yield signs for entering/ exiting the parking lot (which also feeds into a gas station). And naturally, everyone is speeding through the lot at 35 mph, no one giving a damn about graciously allowing anyone the right of way. So you watch every window, check every blind spot in your car, and pray that no one hits you.

I parked three rows from the front of the store, far enough away so that hopefully no one would park next to me. Because the car seat with Eric weighs over 30 pounds, and the stroller is huge, I need a lot of door space to get everything in and out of the car (someone always ends up parking next to me though. I could park my car in the middle of Siberia and someone would park next to me). So I kept Eric in his car seat, put him inside the travel stroller, and *CRASH.*

I had been keeping a cautious eye on a black car that had slammed on its brakes near mine, and another black car that had pulled out in front of it. I don't know what happened, but I heard a loud crash and suddenly a Target bag filled with at least one wine bottle flew into the air and landed less than a parking space away from my stroller.

I honestly thought the driver would just keep on going, but in her defense, she got out and made sure Eric and I were ok. She apologized profusely. I reassured her that we were fine, no one was hurt. It turned out she had accidently left the bag on the top of her car and when she sped away, it flew off. Hey, we've all been there.

I asked her if she needed help picking up the glass. Most of it was inside the Target bag, but she said she would tell someone in Target what happened. But then... she drove away. So I, forever the mom now, went inside and directed a poor manager out to the spot where he picked up the glass. Reminded me of when I worked retail in my youth. Such a thankless job, and yet I had a lot of fun, mostly making fun of nutty customers. Back when I was in my late teens- early 20's... Back when I was YOUNG [sob]. But I digress...

Eric grew out of his duck so the main reason for going to Target was to get a liner for the bottom of the tub. Eric's new thing when dad bathes him is to roll out of the duck and attack the water. The faucet is apparently the most fun toy in the world, after window-blind cords. I'm waiting for the night when Eric figure out how to turn on the shower. I can hear DH screaming now as he's hosed down. hehe... Ah, it's the simple joys in life...

Why won't he SLEEP???

There is nothing more frustrating than knowing your baby is tired and yet he/she refuses to nap! I really hate this 9 month sleep-strike, separation anxiety phase. Please God, let it pass soon... Yesterday he had an hour morning nap. [shrug] He usually naps for one to two hours in the morning, so no big deal. But from 11:45am until he went to sleep at 8pm, do you know how long he napped?? [drumroll please] 10 minutes. Ten freakin' minutes??!!! This child is seriously sleep deprived, and I wish I knew how to help. P.S. Nighttime Orajel doesn't work.

So today I had my second appointment at the Birthing Center. DH came with me this time around. I want him to be a part of this, not only for helping with Eric but for moral support. I have to time these appointments around Eric's nap schedule because he almost never sleeps in the car (makes going out ridiculously difficult). Our appointment was at 10am. By 10:30, we still hadn't seen a midwife, which was unusual, and Eric was getting fussy which meant my husband was getting impatient. He did take the morning off to come with me, but the entire time I think he was mentally calculating the hours he would need to work in order to make up his time. I felt guilty even asking him to come. After the appointment was over, he told me he felt left out by the midwife and wanted to know why I hadn't scheduled blood work, and why I scheduled another morning appointment... I know I should have been patient. I know I should have been sympathetic. But I'm pregnant and hormonal and wasn't in the mood to deal with him being cranky. Not with a baby in the back-seat who was cranky too. I flipped. Then the water works started...

Makes me look forward to next month's appointment.

Bad Horse

OK... If anyone reading this is a fan of Joss Wheedon, then you are probably familiar with Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog I really, REALLY wanted to find a horse costume for Eric and dress him up as "Bad Horse." I thought this would be hilarious and witty. The problem is, no one would know he was "Bad Horse" unless I had a Dr. Horrible T-shirt or something to signify that's what Eric was dressed as. Otherwise, he just looks like... a horse.

Well, every T-shirt is sold out. I can't find anything on Ebay, that glorious life-saver for procrastinators like me. So, I have given up on the "Bad Horse" idea.

Today I had a "play date" with a woman from my mom's group online. This involves the two of us meeting at Dulles Town Center and chatting as we strolled our infants through the mall. We ended up in the Disney Store. I don't know why, it goes against my cynical nature, but I love the Disney Store. I love Disneyworld. I can't wait to take Eric and Baby X there someday.

But Eric must take after his father because as soon as we entered the store, he starts crying. Then he puked. BUT he did start squealing in delight at the Donald Duck Halloween costume. I thought, 'we have a winner,' bought the fluffy thing, and got the heck out of there before he started projectile vomiting on the Mickey Mouse costumes. I love the Donald Duck, but it has no leggings, no footies... And it'll be cold that night. This is what I get for impulse buying. Now I have to find white tights. For a baby boy. In October.

Babies R Us Craziness

So today I had to go to Babies R Us to buy a shower gift for friends of DH and I. They are having a co-ed BBQ baby shower, which I think is an awesome idea and I hope that Eric's napping patterns work out for that day. I swear he is the only baby in the world who *doesn't* sleep in the car...

I was looking forward to a fun trip because Eric loves Babies R Us. I call it "the baby fun store" and he smiles when I put him in his car seat. He usually has a happy time there. Except today. Because today I decided to put him in the front of the cart while I shopped. I'm now in my second trimester (don't get me started about this surprising second pregnancy so quickly after my first) and couldn't use the gray Baby Bjorn (it KILLS your back). As soon as I put him in the seat, he started squirming. Even though he's 9 months, I couldn't use the baby seat cart because it only goes to 18 pounds and my little piggy weighs over 20. And because he's so thin, he spent the entire time slipping down while I tried fruitlessly to keep pulling him up.

So here I am... juggling my huge diaper bag, pulling my baby up with one hand every few minutes, and trying to read my friend's registry while Eric is trying to eat it (if anyone out there can tell me where to find a goat Halloween outfit for him, let me know). He was as patient as a baby could be, but then he had had enough. Especially since I wouldn't let him eat the registry. Let's just say... I've never read a registry so quickly in my life. And what really irked me was all the stares I got. Granted, most women who shop at Babies R Us are expectant mothers. I think I have seen maybe one mom with a child at the store I go to. It's funny... when you have never had a baby, it's so easy to judge moms. I've been there. But once you have a child, you finally realize children can't be controlled and that there are no guarantees, especially when you're out in public. Maybe this is why I never see moms in Babies R Us... :-)